When I woke up this morning first thing I felt, except tiredness, was anger. I was angry I had to get up so early. It’s been always the case with me. At school the teachers were complaining to my mum that I always looked like I was going to fall asleep, and with a few exceptions I really did want to go back to bed. At uni I usually didn’t go to the first lectures, because I was not capable of making myself get up at 6am. And then during my whole time in London I was always tired and sleepy. I complained every single day for 10 years that I had to get up.
Nowadays my schedule might be a little better than before: I get up at 6:45 and it takes me only 20 minutes to drive to school, through markets and South East Asian, exotic streets, but after over a year of doing so, I am complaining on early hours…again!
I just can’t do it. I am not a morning person. Getting up makes my cranky, angry and just plain moody. I try to go to bed early. Yesterday I went to bed at 10 and feel asleep after 12 because I really can’t rest before that.
Of course my weekends have something to do with the tiredness, too but last weekend I didn’t go out and I still feel like I partied the whole time.
I think I just don’t like talking to people and become an introvert when I really don’t sleep enough. My ideal time for sleeping would be 1 am to 11 am, but at the moment I just can’t do it because of work.
So, I do need to work on getting more clients for my writing. I already have one big one. It is an online booking site and I write blog articles for them. The job is for 3 months. It’s a good exercise and experience. They want to work with me for 3 months, and I need to figure out how to become a real SEO writer, so I can earn enough money to sustain my living in Asia. Problem is, there is quite a lot to learn and to do and with my work schedule and shit I have to do here I just don’t have time to do it. Plus, I am tired beyond imagination at the moment and all I think about is sleeping.
I am tempted to quit this job and do focus on the writing….