I have been feeling really positive lately. I still have a lot of anxieties, but I have been watching and reading Byron Katie, and her stuff really helps. Whenever I feel like the worries about the future creep up on me, I just repeat ‘I am fine’ in my mind. I realise that my issues won’t disappear, but at least this thought makes them a little smaller and more insignificant.
I have been spending a lot of time with myself. Yesterday we had another day off (thank you, Thailand!). Usually the night before my holiday I go out with my friends. On Tuesday evening I received around 4 invites to drinks (this reminded me that whenever I think I am lonely, I am so wrong) and I said no to every single one of them. You might think it’s not a big deal, but it is to me. I usually don’t say no to things like that. But I really wanted to be alone. I was tired, sleepy and wanted to take a nap and then watch movies until late at night. And that was what I did. It was awesome.
And yesterday I stayed whole day at home. I did some writing, I read a book, I watched stupid clips on the internet, and then went to yoga in the evening.
Again, nothing special, right? It is to me, because I hardly ever stay at home on my days off.
The weekend is going to be nice, too. I am planning to check out some exhibits on Saturday with C (my new friend, whom I like so much) and meet my sister. My Polish friend is coming on Sunday to visit and will spend 5 days with me. I am very excited to be having a visitor., but I also know that my peace will be ruined during her stay. I just hope I can keep a little bit of balance in my life.