He messages me every single day. We mostly talk about bullshit, joking around. He complains a little sometimes on how boring his life in Germany is. Because of the time difference and the fact he likes to go to bed really late, I get messages from him in the mornings and have a little chat before I go to work. It is nice…

He wants to come back. ‘What would you say if I booked a ticket for January?’ ‘Hell yeah!’ I would say to that. ‘Book it and we will have glorious sex until we die from heart failures’. There are of course money issues and other things he needs to consider, but who cares…

I miss him still and there’s no day that passes by when I don’t think of how much fun we would have when he comes back. However, I am enjoying myself at the moment, and I am a little concerned when I think that I will have to share my free time with another person.

For the last few weeks I have worked out a routine: Mondays are my running days, Tuesday is power yoga, Wednesdays are drinks with friends, Thursdays are running days again (except today, cause I feel extra lazy) and on Fridays I have my Thai lessons and then drinks and dinners with friends. I spend my weekends meeting people, reading and watching a lot of movies. It is a simple routine, but a very strict one and I would hate if someone ruins it now. On top of everything I feel pretty mentally stable and physically strong. I am sure that if HE comes back, that stability will be a little disturbed.

So, I made a pledge to myself that I will put myself first ALWAYS, not matter what. If he likes me the way I think he likes me then he will stick around, even if I don’t have much time for him.

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