‘So, tomorrow is my last day’ he said to me ‘I was thinking of taking you to dinner…if you don’t have any plans that is’
I agreed. For the last two days I’ve actually had fun with him. I followed your advice and stopped expecting romance, or anthing else rather than fun and casual sex.
He came over to my hostel the next day. We went to a dinner.
‘Can I ask what are you escaping from?’ He asked during the meal.
‘Divorce, my job, London..’ I answered. He asked me about it. He told me about his relationships.
At one point he looked down and said ‘I’m sad, you know…I seem like a happy person, people think I’m a selfish prick because I seem so confident, but I’m unhappy. I have a great job, great friends, lovely parents, but there’s something missing…’
‘Maybe you have too much’ I said, all the time thinking ‘are we seriously having this conversation?? Is this guy, who shags everything and is behaving like a total dick really saying this to me??’
This also made me think that we, westernized people, are lost. I met so many westerners, who did the same as I did and went to look for something. We all have our reasons, jobs we don’t like, break ups, deaths, or maybe just burn outs and tiredness with life. Whatever it is, we are all lost and sad, just like tge Turk.
We went to watch Thai boxing. As always, we ‘argued’ a little about him being an asshole. I mentioned the comment he made about the 2 Dutch guys and the German girl and the competition they would have. Well, turned out that I understood it completely in a wrong way. ‘Tell me’ he said ‘How do you think I’d have had a competition with those two guys if I wasn’t even there??? I was just saying that the two guys had a competition with each other’. Oops! He mocked me the whole evening, which at tge end annoyed me a little. He put a shoulder around me and said that the best thing about me was that I always argue back and he loves having arguments with me.
We said good bye to each other. He kissed me and said ‘My advice is stop worrying, stop thinking that much, just have fun. Whatever happened to you was not your fault. Shit happens to everyone. We are all in the darkness and if you have fun you light a little candle.’ He was yet another person to say that to me.
And you know what? I actually had fun yesterday! It was the first date when I fel completely relaxed and laughed because I wanted to and not because I felt obliged to. Maybe it was the fact he was leaving or maybe it was just me, and the advice I took onboard from some of the bloggers here. Whatever it was, it made the whole evening memorable.