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So, the guy shows up for the date and he is good looking: tall, dark, beautiful eyes, white teeth, clean nails.

You like him, he’s nice, interesting and it’s nice to chat to him. You have a drink with him and then he asks if you wouldn’t mind going for a dinner. You agree and during the dinner he orders a bottle of wine. Well, another glass or two wouldn’t hurt, right? So, you down those glasses and you feel a bit braver.

You ask him what he thinks about war in Afghanistan. He becomes uncomfortable, but you push him a little more. Then you say something about how you don’t like imperialist politics of the States and he becomes a bit more awkward. He then takes out his phone and texts someone. You realise that your phone is buzzing, so you look at it and there is a text from him saying: ‘I think those people at the table next to us are Americans’ (oops!).

You feel a little silly, but that doesn’t stop you from rumbling on about politics.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, he says ‘Oh, I have a 6 year old son’ after which you totally flip out, and uncontrollably you say something like ‘I f** hate children. They are small and salivate’, and you start behaving like this is the end of the world, like you are going to marry this guy and adopt the kid.

And that’s it! Good luck!

P.S. I don’t hate children. They are not my favorite thing in the world, but I don’t hate them. I have no idea why I said that…

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